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July 2011

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 GaaaaaAAAHH what's going on in my head right now? It makes so little sense.
Any other point in my life if someone insulted me it would bother me for hours or days or even weeks. Even if I knew it had been a throwaway comment to them and they've forgotten all about it and they're just a twat anyway, it would still bother me. It's just the way I am. 
On Thursday Chris called me an annoying self-righteous opinionated bitch amongst other things I didn't even listen to when he was saying them, and said he didn't give a shit whether I loved or hated him, and after that I felt soooo good. I mean, not about him. I actually bunked off the next day and went to Becca's instead of school because I didn't want to be in a classroom with him. But seriously, why would I feel good about being insulted? I just wonder because if it means I'm masochistic then that's a very bad thing, but if I was happy because it meant I'd made the right decision by ending it then that's a good thing.
I think it might be the latter. The idea of ever being with him again now just seems ridiculous. In fact, I'm kind of annoyed with myself for keeping it going for so long now. You know that facebook like 'looking at your ex and thinking 'was I drunk our whole relationship?' I'm seriously wondering that now. He's just such a cunt I don't even know where to begin and he's not even attractive to make up for it. Weird. What was going on in my head? What *is* going on in my head? So confusing....
Righto, I'll shut up now...

Comments

Aww, you sound a tad confused. Anyway, he is a cunt for saying those things so... :) *hugs*
Thank you :) Yeah, he is, but he's extremely charismatic so most people tend to take his side. But it makes me grateful for all my really really awesome friends who understand (and I'm including you in that btw!)
Oh and do you have access to MSN? I feel like I haven't spoken to you for years...well not years. Too long anyway.
Yeah, sure do! I've logged onto it a few times but I always forget. :D I'll do my best to stay logged on for a bit longer in future though in the hope I'll be able to talk to you.
xoxo
Aw, thank you :) sympathy and cyberhugs are very sweet and much appreciated xxxx

*sigh* Where are all the decent guys, eh?